From Dawn.

Rules:
1. Go into your archive.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.


Pissed minda phonecall is the middle of the night.

Look What I did??

I can't believe it!! I have been charting now for the last few months, and have finally ovulated (according to computer generated software, but eh, that's good enough for me). Now I just need my sperm donor to get back from Moomba!

Ok, so I understand that by showing you this picture of my chart, you can see when I get my period, when we have sex and the consistency of my cervical mucus. Gross. Yes. But i make no apologies for it! We are all adults and Im sure we'll get over it (and for those who know me IRL, you'll know when to avoid me ie. premenstual phase). So yes, I feel I have achieved alot this week by sitting down on the lounge watching copius amounts of Secret Life Of Us!!

On that topic, I am so addicted to that show. I have series 1 & 2 on dvd and I just can't drag myself away from the tv!! I have watched almost the entire series in 1 week, so much for my uni work eh?? So. Tragic. At least Im not addicted to Dawson's creek, now THAT is tragic!!! My personal feeling on Secret Life is that the show went down hill when Alex (Claudia Karvan) left. My dad explained it perfectly, it went from being a drama series to being a soap opera, and of course 'I' don't watch soap opera's....did I mention I love Neighbours??

Anyway, today Im celebrating because I laid an egg!!

Alpha

Shizzle my Manizzle

This is the name of the netball team I have just joined. And yes I did create the name - don't ask what it means, I don't know myself, it just sounds funny! So yes, I have dragged my ever growing carcass off the lounge and am playing 'sport'. Holy. Crap. I am so unfit it's scary, but I must say I did note some improvement in this weeks game - I actually ran! My body is broken today though - Im well and truly paying for it! But of course, life would not be life without a gripe (that almost rhymed). So anyway the uniform is blue pants, white top...easy eh? Or not. I went out and SPECIFICALLY bought blue shorts and a white top, I wore them for the second time last night (never washed) only to be told by the TROLL of the centre that our shorts didnt match and we would incur a 3 goal penatly. She said they all had to be the same dark blue. I pointed to my pants and said "These pant's would be blue enough yeah?" to which she replied "No! They are faded!". FADED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BRAND NEW PANTS ARE NOT FADED!!!!!!! I was so shitty at her. Troll. Troll Mole. How anal retentive can you get?? So anyway today I recieve an email from my friend Mark who is the 'coordinator', and I use this term lightly, and this is what it read.

Right,
We have 7... apparently.
I dont have Horse's email address, but I'm sure we can work this out amongst
ourselves and let him know.
Last night we were told our shorts were crap, which looking around was a
fair assessment. Some of the worst shorts I have ever seen (including mine
of course) were being sported... but I think she was talking about the
actual colour. We need to decide on a colour and try and get a matching set.
Horse just bought himself a pair of dark navy shorts that looked the pick of
the bunch. Are we happy to try and match that? The white top thing is easy
and I'm happy to stick to that unless you guys think otherwise... let me
know.
Thoughts? Comments?

Yeah I have some comments! How about I already fucking went out and bought some f'ing blue pants so how the hell am I supposed to get my pants any more fricken darker blue than the ones I already just went out and fricken bought just for your stupid netball team!!!! YEAH!! Stick that in your fricken dark blue short hole!!

Alpha

Biggest week EVER!

I have had the biggest week this week, so Ill break it down for you.

Saturday 10th September: Today we woke bright and early to prepare our room for the installation of our awesome new wardrobes!! They look fab and Im so relieved to finally be living out of organised cupboards rather than a rat's nest on the floor (we risked losing Darcy in it many a time). My mate Heidi and her hub Aaron came over to install them (well Aaron did, Heidi and I just watched). Whilst this was going on, Adam was out 'car shopping'. We had decided awhile ago a new car was in order because the old XF Falcon was just too greedy and was hurting the old hip pocket (as the saying goes). We were looking for a station wagon, so I was a little surprised when Adam rang to say he had just purchased a hatchback.............! But it really is a great car which Im having a slight love affair with. Anyway, that night we went to the football and had a really SHIT time, and I mean SHIT. We stayed to the end despite feeling as though my guts had been ripped open and sprayed all over footy park, yeah good night! Luckily, Adam and I didn't have a fight despite the loss we both were feeling. Went home. Slept.

Sunday: Today we celebrated Darcy's 2nd birthday. We had every man and his dog over (or every friend and their kid) to help us. I awoke REALLY early and reassembled our room, following this was a meltdown. I freaked a little about how in HELL I was going to organise myself for a party. But I did. I made a number 2 cake (no not a shit cake) which was bright orange with a cut out picture of Nemo on it.....all class with my cut out fish. It really was a great day, the highlight being the mini fillet mignons (heaven) that I had prepared earlier in the day to be bbqued, no shit, pure heaven on a toothpick! I was absolutely shattered by the end of the day, and slept, alot. Im waiting for pics to me sent to me by this person.

Monday: Today is Darcy's actual birthday, the day 2 years ago in which my guts were sliced open and exposed to the elements. At least my vagina remained intact this day. I had uni so Darcy went into daycare where all the kids helped bake him a cake. That night Adam's parental unit's and his sister came over for tea, which thankfully Adam prepared all by himself while I died. Darcy got absolutely spoilt rotten and by the end of the day knew how to say "present", "cake", "Birthday" and "miiiiiiiiiine". Awesome.

Tuesday: Can't remember except I played netball tuesday night. Oh. Shit.

Wednesday: Today I went to Uni, but to play! I actually went to the daycare party instead of my class. Loved it. My nan and her pipe band buddies (music people, not drugs) played to the kids and the general reception was good (minus Darcy who screamed his lungs out). Wednesday night we went to friends place for tea, which was really nice and relaxing.

Thursday: I went to local play cafe, and for about a halfer, I was the only one there! Place to myself!! Then my mates turned up. Thursday arvo we took Darcy to a local park for duck feeding, play equiptment and icecream.

Friday: I awoke at a sinly hour to drive Adam to airport to fly to work, see ya in two weeks!! I then went to playgroup followed by McDOnalds for my nephews birthday, you can probably read more about that here soon. Friday night I had pizza at my folks place.

Saturday: I had a relatively lazy day, but rejoiced in a West Coast success. I then went to my sisters place for dinner to again celebrate my nephews birthday, there may be more on that at a later date.

So yeah, big week, but now Im on holidays so I plan to do sweet F A even though I have a bucket load of uni work to catch up on because Im a slack biatch.

Alpha.

Hello Sunshine!

Finally the sun has come out of hiding! We have had the best weather in Adelaide these past few days, and Im in such a good mood because of it. My energy level's have gone way up and basically Im not a turbo bitch anymore (Im just a four-cylinder bitch now). Yesterday the fam went to the Royal Adelaide Show. HOLY CRAP! That place is bloody expensive! It was $17 each just to get in, Darcy got in for free (thank god!) and then basically it was just a big spend up for the rest of the day. For example, we wanted to put Darcy on this truck ride that he was getting excited about but were a bit worried that he would freak out a little when the ride actually started, but then I noticed there was a parent accompying their child by sitting on the back of the ride, so when I went to pay the $4.50 (yes that's right) for the toddler ride, I asked if I could sit on the back, to which the dumb usually unemployed except at showtime troll said 'sure!, for another $4.50', to which I replied 'how about no, and you go and stick the whole ride up your saggy usually unemployed ass!'.......well actually no I didn't say that, I actually said 'no thanks' and walked away calmy, but that's what I wanted to say! DAMMIT! So yeah, it was really expensive, but we'll probably still go next year (dammit).

Darcy is turning 2 on Monday, and we are having a small party (about 1000 guests) which should be good fun, at least the weather will be nice. I'll let you know how it goes!

Alpha.

Adam is coming home today, I am saved.

Adam is getting home today, my god it couldn't be soon enough. I have turned into a crazy person this week. I have thrown the best pity party EVER, but like all party's, it must come to an end. And really , let's be honest, my life ain't that bad. Today my biggest problem is that I can't drag my carcus off this computer to go and straighten my hair, so I am going to look like a ho bag for the rest of the day! The straightening thing has ruined me. I don't feel human now if I don't straighten my hair. There's no going back to just running a comb through the hair after you spend that hour preening yourself with two burning hot metal plates, oh no, you can only move forward! I'll do it this afternoon before I pick Adam up.

Last night I went to my sisters house for tea, she made an awesome low fat butter chicken for tea! mmmmmm. Was very nice, will certainly be pinching that recipe off her and claiming it as my own creation. But how's how she's being robbed! She is currently missing two items of Australian Post mail! One is a life and death box of sample's (including Pods, holy shit who invented these evil creatures, between my mother and myself, and Darcy who was thrown a few, we have eaten 3 whole boxes!) and small tin's of tuna, and 2 cooking magazines! She's also missing a ball of yarn. Personally, I would be more cut about the pods, but she's mostly grieving the yarn needed to finish our father's fathers day present. Speaking of fathers day, I bought Adam 3 Godfather dvd's. Godfather I, II, & III. Usually as a box set they are about $60, but i bought them separately for $12 each! He'll never know!! so then I spent an amount on a great pair of shoes that I wouldn't normally spend. $4.86 cents!!! They have now taken over the suede boots to be favourites in my shoe collection!! Gotta love a pair of slip on pink flats eh??

I need a digital camera.

Alpha.

Wedding photos

Here are some pics of our wedding!!!







Darcy smelling the roses!




















This is my dad walking me down the 'aisle'












This is the wedding party after signing the registry


















This is me, Adam and Darcy

Yo Peeps, midriff is out!

Right, so today I went to a local kids play cafe. That's a place where there is play equiptment (where children are easily lost or trapped) indoors with a kiosk that serves coffee and other high fat foods. I went there for the second time this week with some friends because Darcy is the devil, Ill elaborate on that a little later. Anyway, we are sitting there, and I am feeling like the fattest peice of fat in the world, when this woman (that's a little rich) comes in wearing tight pants and a midriff top. What's the prob with that you say? Well one, midriff was the 90's, and the 90's is the new 80's, as in it's not on. Second, she had a muffin top!!! Actually rolls sticking out over the top over her tight pants, and stretch marks!!! Now look, Im not about to go on like Im a stick, coz that would be lying (which we all know I don't do), but I don't get around in midriffs. The worst thing is, i could not stop staring! I was gawping! Ahh dear, I need a drink of water.

So I have been in crisis this week. Darcy has turned into Satan. He's 2 in 11 days, so I guess it's normal but HOLY CRAP!! He throws beautiful public tantrums, Im the mother you all stare out when their kid is out of control. I just can't handle it. He also smacks me and growls at me when I tell him off. And when he get's in lots of trouble, he starts crying for 'daddy'...oh puhleeeaaaaaseee! *sigh*. Why would I want to procreate when I already have one demon to annoy me??? I guess so the can play together and leave me alone.

As for procreation, I reached meltdown yesterday for the first time. It's been almost 5 months ttc now and yesterday I had it. I know 8 girls who are pregnant. EIGHT! Im happy for each and everyone of them, truly I am. Im over the moon about some of them, but it doesn't stop that ugly green eyed monster coming out and kicking me in the guts! Especially because we were the first out of a small group who decided we wanted more, and we are going to be the last to get it! Adam rang me last night and I just broke down on the phone, he felt a little helpless but pointed out that we hadnt really been 'trying', well HELLO!? What more can you do than penis in vagina????????? I went to see a naturopath who has given me some god awful herbal remedy to take to help me ovulate, so we'll see where that road takes us.

Righteo poteypo! Im going to leave you all with that image.

Alpha.